It can be very stressful when your baby is crying and you can’t get them to calm down. Babies are made to cry to let us know that something is wrong or they have a need. And their cry is made to bother us as parents so that we do something about it. Here are some ways to calm a crying baby.
Why Does My Baby’s Cry Bother Me?
If a baby’s cry didn’t bother us or they didn’t cry it would be too easy to forget to feed them, change their diaper or we would tune them out. A baby’s cry causes its mother to go into “fight-or-flight mode”. This makes the heart rate increase, raises blood pressure, and can make your hands and feet sweaty. This is because we are made to do something about it and this makes us do something when the baby has needs that need met.
Babies cry because they need something. Sometimes it could be an itchy tag, a sore throat, or other times it could be a cuddle they need. Crying is their only form of communication and they depend on their parents to keep them alive. Crying keeps them alive, when a baby cries their body goes into fight-or-flight mode as well and they get very stressed. When their need is met or is being met their stress goes down and they learn that they can trust their needs will be taken care of when they cry.
There haven’t been a lot of studies done on ignoring your baby’s cries, but I did find a small one that was done. It shows that even though the babies stopped crying after a period of time, they were still stressed. They just didn’t cry to let their needs be known because they learned that their needs weren’t going to be met.
But anyway, back to the topic at hand, how do I calm a crying baby?
How To Calm A Crying Baby
1. First Make Sure They Are Okay
If you are looking to the internet for advice you have probably already checked everything that could be wrong with your baby. But just in case you missed something, here are a few things you should check.
Check their diaper, and make sure it is dry and they don’t have a rash or anything.
Try to nurse them or make them a bottle and see if they are hungry. Sometimes they may need to taste a little milk before they realize they want to eat. Dripping a little on their tongue can make them start eating.
Make sure that their clothes are not rubbing somewhere that could hurt them or they don’t have a scratchy tag. They might just have something irritating them. Check them for any red spots indicating that the outfit or diaper is bothering them.
Check if they are too hot or cold. Feel their upper back or chest to check if they are too hot or cold, they should be warm, not sweaty or chilly. If they feel chilly or too hot then remove or add layers accordingly.
Burp them or move their legs to check for gas. Lay them on their back, and gently pedal their legs to remove gas. You can also push their legs up in a slight circular motion.
2. Put Them In A Wrap
If you know me, you know I love my baby wraps and wear my babies a lot when they are little. Wearing them not only reduces their crying but can also calm them down if they are already crying.
Putting them in a wrap and wearing them creates an environment similar to the womb, which used to be all they knew. In a wrap, they have pressure on them and are close to you and your heartbeat which is calming. They also are kept warm and are in close to the same spot as they were before they were born, so as you move they are moving similarly to how they were before they were born.
This little trick doesn’t only work for babies though. I will still throw my almost 2-year-old in a wrap if she is sick or overtired and it works just as well.
3. Go Outside To Calm A Crying Baby
Even as an adult, I find the outdoors calming and relaxing. I find that it does the same for babies too, it works even better if it is cold outside. If they are screaming and nothing is working, stepping out in the cold for a minute can distract them a minute to calm down.
The sounds of the outdoors are very calming, the peepers in the summertime, the wind or rain, and the quiet sound of nothing in the winter. Taking them for a walk, either in your arms or a stroller can also work to calm them down, and sometimes get them to go to sleep.
4. Give Them A Cold Wet Wipe Or Washcloth
This might seem silly, but it works. Sometimes when my children are crying and I can’t figure out what is wrong I give them a cold wet washcloth or wipe. If they aren’t old enough to hold it I will wipe their face with it.
Often it will calm a crying baby down, even if it’s just a long enough distraction to get them to eat or get them to take their pacifier.
Sometimes if my youngest is fidgety in the night giving him one helps him sleep better. I have no idea why it works, but it’s worth a try!
5. Use Water To Calm A Crying Baby
Water can calm a crying baby instantly, as long as your baby likes water that is. Bathe them, or just stick their hands or feet in the water. My babies didn’t like water for the first month, but after that water worked very well when nothing else was working.
Water also works if you have a toddler who is extra grumpy cause they didn’t take a nap, is just having a rough day, or is sick. A bath, or even just a couple of buckets of water and some things to scoop the water with can keep them happy for a long time.
6. Bounce/Rock Them
It is a simple thing, but bouncing and/or rocking a baby is calming to them, it sure can get tiring though.
Bouncing while sitting on an exercise ball can help make it a little easier to bounce them for a long period of time.
We have a stroller that you can bounce really well while walking and sometimes it works well for helping calm them down.
Patting their bottom or rubbing their back while you bounce or rock them can help it be extra calming.
7. Lay Them On Their Stomach Over Your Arm
This is such a small thing, but there is something about it and sometimes it works.
Instead of holding them on their back on your arm, flip them over and lay their head facing out with your hand between their legs. Walk around with them like this and pat their bottom with your other hand and you might be surprised how quickly they fall asleep.
8. Turn On Music And Sing To Them
We sing a lot around our house. Someone is crying? Sing. We are happy? We sing. Doing the chores? Sing. Going for a walk? We sing. In the car? You guessed it, we sing. But anyway, music and singing work wonders to calm a crying baby.
You might not think you are a good singer, but that doesn’t matter. Your baby knows your voice and your voice is calming to them even if you don’t like how you sound.
Sometimes you will have to sing pretty loud to catch their attention, but then singing or humming softly in their ear works.
Conclusion On How To Calm A Crying Baby
These are 8 tricks that I use for calming a crying baby, hopefully, they work for you too. Often I will combine several things if I need to. If putting the baby in the wrap didn’t work, I would then go for a walk outside with the baby in the wrap, sing to the baby, add a bounce to my step on the walk, and pat the baby all at the same time. Just whatever combination works.
Let me know if I missed any tips on how to calm a crying baby in the comments below!
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